Holy Moly is all I got to say....

Well folks it has been a really long couple of weeks...... Satan really attacked our family and brought us to our knees but we are not out for the count.  We were not putting on our full armor and each one of us in our own way let him in.  With God we are stronger than he can ever be as long as we protect ourselves properly.  Our family is truly wounded by all that has happened but I truly believe God will help us pick up the pieces and be whole again. 

We escaped from reality for a few days and reconnected as a family on our vacation to Disneyland.  We had an amazing time and getting away from this Wonderland that is Fort Irwin was amazing.  We needed the time away and the time together.  Although now I need a vacation to recover from vacation! 

Please pray for the hearts of my children that they can heal and overcome our imperfections and the worlds contstant negitive to grow in God's Love and be the people he intends for them to be.  Please ask him to work on our hearts as parents and his children and help us to be who we are supposed to be in him.  I need WISDOM!!

This is an amazing read!!

Check this out.... She says things better than I ever could have!!
http://itsalmostnaptime.blogspot.com/2010/02/i-dont-want-my-children-to-be-happy.html

Time is flying!!

Wow it is crazy it has almost been a month since I last posted.  Life in this household has been intense.  It never seems to slow down......  With two teenagers and a preteen add a 9 year old who's personality can be larger than life, plus a 6 year old who doesn't think she ever has to listen to anyone plus a two year old who is into everything and sneaky as can be and the cherry on the top is the 4 month old who is a fussy pants alot of the time................. I am about to lose my mind at times!! That is why God made kids so cute, so when you were at the point to lose it they would do something cute to remind you what a precious gift it is to have and raise children!! 

Satan really seems to be attacking me spiritually, I know with all of my heart I need to spend time in his word and in prayer and when I do so I am so much happier and a much better Mommy.... So why is it so hard for me to get into any kind of routine with my bible studies let alone a routine in the rest of my life.  I have been fighting this battle with routines for soooooo long.  I have great ideas but when it comes right down to it, I never stick to it.  I use excuses like the baby kept me up so I am going to sleep in a little bit or anything else I can think of.  He has also been using the distractions of worry, finances, moving etc.... When I know in my heart of hearts that those things while they are important God will always and has always seen to it we have way more than we could ever need! 

My Goal this week is to come up with and stick to some sort of morning routine.... Getting up before my kids to have my time with God and my coffee before the chaos starts!! So unlike what I ususally do which is come up with some complex plan that is overwhelming my goal is only to get up by 7 am and have 30 min with God in the morning!!!!!  I would like to also add getting dressed first thing and being ready for the day.  If I can do that little bit maybe things will start falling more into place and I won't be so overwhelmed daily!!

Please anyone reading this, Please pray for me to overcome this pure laziness in the mornings so I can function better for my family!!!  We could also use some prayers in that we are going to be moving this year and have a house to sell so we can maybe buy a house in TX.  Please pray for my childrens hearts and for God to give me the wisdom in training  and leading them to him.  Please pray for wisdom in the social workers, judges and families in our adoption situations.  Please just pray for us God will know what we need. 

Calendars and Friends......

Wow, I sat down and tried to enter everything into my new and very awesome free online calender (Cozi) and I am so overwhelmed just looking at it. Sometimes I feel I am running around like a chicken with my head cut off!! Awana, PWOC, Girl Scouts X 3 girls, Soccer, Volleyball, independant study and the list goes on. This isn't including doc apts, dentist apts, whining crying babies and making meals, not to mention bill paying, laundry, meals, keeping kids on task and doing there chores, etc,etc........ Sometimes I wonder if I am going to end up committed. I don't always have time to be as attentive as I would like to be to my extended family and friends. In reality somedays I don't even get to take a shower and spend alone time with God. Looking at this Calendar reminded me of just how much I actually have going on and hurts me even more that someone could yell at me telling me how everything is all about me and what a selfish terrible person I am. It is not because I am selfish and self righteous (as someone recently told me), it is because I am barely staying afloat with what I have on my plate. I am forgetful, unorganized, messy and sometimes I am lazy and just want to sit and blog or read in my bathroom. Seems like God could've called someone better to be a mother to these 7 amazing kids but he must think I can do it, only with him holding me up am I going to make it!! True friends would never tear me down and expect me to put them above my ;family and although the lost friendships make me a little sad I do believe it is for the best. Some friendships are for a reason and some are for a season but letting go can still be very sad. I truly have never meant to hurt anyones feelings or make anyone angry so I will put a sorry out there.....into cyberspace.Sighing a big sigh of relief!

New Horizons

Well it looks like our journey may be changing in the not so distant future! Still not something I can discuss on a public blog. Looks as if we are going to be having some permanent positive changes in our future.

I feel so blessed to have had our family grow so much in the last year. Every heart ache and problem was so worth adding 4 new members to our family. Seeing the hearts of my bio girls grow and how readily they gave up time with their mom and dad to accept new sibilings into there home and hearts....... It is so beyond words. All three of my girls are saying they want to foster and adopt when they are grown up. If only we could plant the seeds of love and taking care of the orphans into all young people maybe there won't be so many children in need of loving homes! I don't know where this journey is going to lead us in the future but I know with every ounce of my heart that as long as God is the pilot we can not be steered wrong! Don't get me wrong there are times when things get hard that I ask God are you sure I am strong enough to be everything these kids need. I have the faith that God will hold me and my many children in his hands and never let us down.

It is a very uncomfortable situation when people tell my husband and I that we are such great people for doing what we are doing..... Just and FYI these kids we have brought into our home and hearts will always be more of a blessing to us than we could ever be to them! It is almost a selfish thing because the rewards in our hearts are so much more, how could we not do it? In all honesty we are not giving anything up! Yes, our house is messier with more kids, yes sometimes I feel like I am going to lose my mind, yes sometimes I get impatient and yell, yes sometimes I cry in my bathroom praying with everything I have asking God to give me the wisdom to help heal hurts and scars and have the patience and the eyes to see the misbehaviors for what they are........ It is not perfect, we did not start this because we were perfect parents, we didn't start this because we thought that it would be easy.... We did this because I have known in my heart since I was very young that I wanted to adopt at least one child that had some of the same problems I went through as a child. I know what it is like to feel like a guest in someone else's home, I know what it is like to always have to change to fit into a family, I know what it is like to challenge those that say they love you because everyone has always given up when the going got tough.

Please take the time to pray for our family as we experience the ups and downs that we can be strong in the knowledge that with God all things are possible!

I feel special!

Wow I am super stoked!! I have had 14 people look at my blog. 14 whole real life people care about what I have to say.... I feel so special! I was pretty bummed earlier when my thing said zero! I was thinking nobody likes me everybody hates me I think I'll go eat worms!

Wow it has been awhile.....

Well as I have said our lives never never slow down. We have had new blessings added to our already crazy house. I can't not believe how God has blessed our family in so many ways. In June 2010 we got a call for a pregnant teenage girl , and knowing if we got the call then the child was ours we told them we would pick her up that day. It was scary and with blind faith, with some of these teens out there we just had no idea what we were getting into. I am so glad we listened to our hearts and brought her into our home. She is an amazing addition to our family. C is 16 and like I said was pregnant. Her intent orginially was to keep the baby and with our support raise him herself. On Jan. 1st she made the decision to have us adopt W and we told her that we would. There was alot of talking about possibilities but we had to make sure it was really what she wanted and make sure we were not going to lose her in the process. It has been a couple of weeks since her decision and I think she is doing great and so is W!! Now my life is just a bit more hectic with more diapers and feedings and such but looking at his sweet face it is worth every bit of extra stress and chaos!

So we are now the proud parents of 7 children right now!! God is definately providing for us though. We were able to purchase a 15 passenger van so we could lug the whole army in one vehicle. So here it is a run down on ages C16, M14,S 12, B 9, K 6, A 2, W 3months..... Our lives are moving into a new direction and we are very pleased.... can't share some things on blog. Who knows who could be reading it!!

Now we have to trust that God will guide us in caring for and guiding this vivacious bunch! We are praying for quick desicions and a system that is broken and all the kids we can't take in!! I have been referred to as a kid hoarder!! I would take them all in if I could. I do know that right now my life is full and so are my hands so I will be content with the kids I have. It is still bizarre to think that at this time last year I only had 3 kids!

Hopefully I will keep this updated because our lives are an amazing, chaotic, loving rollercoaster!!!!!!!!!!!!!!